Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Clapped

We clapped and clapped. I notice that you did not stand up. I can feel you. You're not the kind of person who like to fake things. That's why I like you, by the way. But I want to build this wall around me and I won't let you in...

We walked. We talked. About everything else under the sun but us. Have you read Jonathan Safran Foer? He's hillarious. He almost reminds me of JD Salinger, but more brilliant. What? Did I say that? I've never said that before about anyone. I didn't even said that about John Updike.

Yeah. Sure. I don't drink (anymore). But I can smell your scotch. I loved scotch. I used to take a sip from my boyfriend's drink. "Which one" "What do you mean, which one" "Which boyfriend" "O, he's gone." "He dump me." "O" "OK" "Where is he now?" "I have no idea" "Do you love him?" "It doesn't matter." "OK."

"What's that that you order?" "Somekind of chicken artichoke pasta." "That's funny. That's my favorite food here." I don't think it's funny. I think it's funny that you surprised me by not telling me that you broke up with your girlfriend three months ago, asked me to go with you, and here we are the two of us, when I thought I would have a chance to know your girlfriend more. I have to be careful not to get in this situation again. It's the last thing in the world I wanted to experience again. "What." "What?" "Nothing." "O."

"I think the family on the corner wanted to buy Kaldi's." "Really?" "Really." "That's great." "You should talk to them." Why? O, may be because he knows I love Kaldi's so much. But I have to get back to the presentation of this Fountain Square development plan. For the first time, I felt that they have been listening to people. This is the kind of people we need. The kind who listens.

"So, are you ready to move back?" "Is there any empty apartment? I thought they are full." "Well, we could offend someone and call you so that you can move back." No, thank you. The 2nd last thing in the world I want is to live across from my ex-boyfriend. "October 21st. Are you in?" "I don't know. I should've think of going home. In fact, it's pretty definite that I will go home." "Well, may be it's good that you're not going with us. Because, I am afraid, if you go to Portland, you'll never come back. I could surely see you there." Well, I fell in love with all those big convenient cities with great public transportation, but something about Cincinnati kept my feet stand still and did not move a bit. It's definitely a challenge to be here, but in my season of life, this is the perfect kind of challenge that I need."May be" was the word that came out instead.

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